Living Quietly
Ah ha! How refreshing it is to read a book that seems to be teaching me about myself. I come from a family of readers, so you might think I’m always reading something or other. However, my reading has happened in waves ever since I started college, and I’ve primarily read books just for kicks since freeing myself from the school system.
My parents recently sent me this book as part of a birthday package.
I’ve only made it 39 pages into the book, but I can tell it’ll be a good read. The subtitle says it all: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking. The fact that my mom picked it out for me makes me laugh because she’s very much an extrovert who can’t stop talking. In fact, after moving to Alaska for college, I recognized that I was able to stay quiet while growing up because she’d answer questions for me during conversations with others. Don’t worry, mom! It was very handy. 🙂
Lately I’ve been trying to decide where I might fit on the Myers-Briggs personality test. So far I’ve only determined that I’m definitely more introverted than extroverted. This paragraph from Susan Cain’s book (photo above, published 2012) sums it up nicely:
“Introverts, in contrast, may have strong social skills and enjoy parties and business meetings, but after a while wish they were home in their pajamas. They prefer to devote their social energies to close friends, colleagues, and family. They listen more than they talk, think before they speak, and often feel as if they express themselves better in writing than in conversation. They tend to dislike conflict. Many have a horror of small talk, but enjoy deep discussions.”
It’s so simple for me to refrain from talking. Unless I feel strongly about something or have a good story, I generally don’t feel a need to speak up. Too frequently people cut others off mid-thought in conversation; as a quieter person, I don’t want to fight to be heard. While growing up I never understood why kids shared whispered conversations while a teacher taught the class. Generally I’ve always thought, “What on earth is so important that you can’t wait until the instructor is done before you start talking?” Sadly this even applies to some college courses where students go into debt to “listen” to a professor!
Friends say I became more of a talker and more outgoing during college – a statement with which I generally agree. However, over the past couple years I’ve found myself regressing to a less active social state. When I’m on the road traveling, meeting people and sharing stories is one of the highlights! When I’m at “home”… it’s different. I don’t need to go out with friends or call/text just for the sake of having something to do. This is partially because I’m frugal and dislike spending money, but also because I’m content just reading, cooking, writing, biking, taking my nice camera for a walk, dreaming about travel, running, or thinking about life. In fact, I don’t need a lot of social interaction to get through a day.
Last night while I was trying to convince myself to sleep, I sat on the couch and watched the snow fall as I read the introduction of Cain’s book. Therein I found some insight into my combination of heritage, personality, and travel style. Bear with me on this one as I stretch some statements to be entertaining.
According to Susan Cain and some Google magic, Finland is known for being quite introverted. Guess who happens to be 50% Finnish? That’s right, I cry inside whenever someone mispronounces sauna. Apparently Finnish introversion skipped my mom and jumped straight to both my brother and me.
When I learned half of my heritage is introverted, I googled the concept to see what other people had to say about the Finnish culture’s personality. One particular article I found tickled me. The Huffington Post Canada wrote an article entitled 10 Places Perfect for Introverted Travellers. Obviously an article about this is subject to personal travel styles and opinions. Some introverts like connecting with locals and fellow travelers while on the road, but others probably travel to get away from having to deal with people and instead seek anonymity, solitude, or the simplicity of nature. Personally I combine a little of both and end up with well-rounded experiences.
Seeing the first two travel destinations in this article cracked me up. #1 wasn’t too hard to guess based on what I’ve been reading: Finland. Apparently I do need to visit the land of my mom’s ancestors. #2 is the icing on the cake for all of this introverted business and my personality. Ready? Destination #2 is…
New Zealand!
How’s that for a sign? Clearly there’s nothing scientific about this article, but I find it rather hilarious that my heritage and favorite country top the list.
I’m intrigued by the entire introvert-extrovert spectrum, so Quiet should offer plenty to think about. Perhaps I’ll even learn more about how to deal with myself – whoever that may be.
0 thoughts on “Living Quietly”
I consider myself somewhat of an introvert, too, and have taken the Myers-Briggs personality test which mostly confirmed that. I need alone time every single day to recharge–yesterday I was daydreaming about being home alone all day today, but now I’m on the internet! Oops… nice blog, cousin.
Thanks Claire! If you haven’t tried to check out that book, you really should. It mentions personality traits throughout the book that made me go “hey, that’s me!” It was pretty fascinating. Enjoy your alone time. I definitely understand the importance of recharging. 🙂